“ I don’t think I’ll ever get married”
This is something I have said a number of times. Not because I am a lonely singleton who is giving up hope on love – quite the opposite more because I’m not sure if I see the point.
Despite the fact my Mother and Father are about to reach their 25th wedding anniversary and are happy together, I was bought up at a time where many of my friends parents would go through divorce. I saw my friend’s Mums moan about their ex husbands, heard about the cost of breaking up and ultimately didn’t understand why people were getting married.
I never grew up dreaming of that big white wedding, I was busy dreaming about how when I was an adult I could eat as many sweets as I pleased. And when my friends would discuss their fantasy princess wedding I would be thinking about other things I’d like to do when I grew up!
The problem is that when you’re a kid that states that “ I don’t think marriage is for me” it is assumed that it is because you think boys have cooties… however when I now say these exact same words in my twenties I am looked at as if I have shared some devastating news. The look received when telling people this is a look of sympathy and confusion, but I’m not too sure why! We’re in an age where being an independent woman is fashionable, not relying on a man is cool and a woman can strut her stuff in trousers and trainers if she so pleases. But, if you are in a long-term relationship and utter the words “ I’m not sure I am interested in getting married’ the whole world reverts back into the 1950’s whereby it is frowned upon and weird.
Today, more and more of my friends are getting engaged sending out cute invites and saving up desperately so that they can have the big day that they have always dreamed of. However, I’m still spending my money on a fancy bottle of gin and a monthly Nandos! In reality with the average wedding costing over £20,000 and women in their twenties being on low starting wages, I am glad this is not a goal I long for!! I am too poor for that and with £20,000 I could put a deposit on a property or travel the world or to be quite honest buy a tonne of handbags and shoes, that’ll last longer than a day.
So, next time your friend says “ I don’t think I will ever get married” please do not look at her like she is extremely ill! Instead give her a high-five and understand that she’ll happily get drunk at your special day!
And to all of you who tell me I will change my mind… maybe… But we will see